The Last Church

“No one ever dies. I have been what you call dead. It was only a door. Nothing in the universe is ever destroyed. It only changes form. There is no greater freedom than life with out [sic] the baggage of a body and the restrictions that brings. The body is just the womb of the spirit that we are. You will out grow it. Soul, spirit is energy maintained and directed beyond and with out [sic] the body.”

Michael Edward Rippie, PBUH

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This page exists to tell the world about Michael Edward Rippie and to let you make up your own mind about him.

Who is Michael Edward Rippie?

Owner of thelastchurch.org

The simple answer is a nobody who should stay that way.

Born 9th July 1946. This has not stopped him claiming to have fought in World War II at times.

Died at some unknown time, probably as a result of a smoking related heart attack. Of course he defines death as being his heart stopped beating, which is a rather pathetic definition. However he considers that he has risen from the dead and is called by God. He's On A Mission From God.

Magical Powers

Aside from being resurrected from the dead Michael Rippie claims to have magic powers. At least he claims he has done magical things and yet when challenged tries to pretend that he never made any such claim and he can do only what everybody can do.

Rippie's Levitating Rock Andy Price said levitation was not possible and I said it was. For proof he demanded I levitate myself off the ground for 60 seconds. I said that was to easy as I am only 225 lb. I told him to keep an eye on the 7 thousand lb rock. I raised the rock up 4 feet off the ground and began to move it up the hill. Naturally he could not believe his eyes and while jabbering about needing proof or no one would believe him he raised his camera and took this picture. I said picture or not no one will believe you. Still, he insisted I send this to you. You can call it Rippie's believe it or not, floating Rock. Andy wonders if the picture can be used for proof of what he saw. Andy@thelastchurch.org if you want to talk to him. thelastchurch.org if you want to see things you can't prove by the power of sight alone, come on over to the The Last Church site. A preacher is the blind leading the blind in our book so don't come looking for Sunday school! --Michael Rippie michael@thelastchurch.org Source

Who the hell is Andy? Why is there no photograph of either Michael Rippie or this Andy?

How can you trust a witness who gives an email address that is directly controlled by Michael Rippie, the owner of thelastchurch.org?

Close inspection of the photograph reveals that the rock does have a shadow, this is to the lower left, the same direction as all the other shadows in the photograph. The dark patch that Rippie wants you to believe is a shadow cannot possibly be its shadow.

To the right of the rock a small bunch of grass can be seen which clearly is growing up from the ground in front of the rock and grows up slightly in front of the rock. The rock is clearly where it has been for a long time, sat firmly in the Nevadan excuse for soil. What appears to be its shadow is simply a patch of dark soil which seems to be largely horizontal, it could well be a damp stain, possibly from oil that leaked from Rippie's own all-terrain-vehicle. Whatever that mark is it is not the shadow of a levitated rock.

I don't do what you call magic tricks for anyone. It only serves to confuse them. You would be looking at me when you should be looking into yourself. The kingdom of God is with in [sic]. Only you can prove anything to you, and only by doing it yourself. If you ever get inside yourself you will see me and know who I am. Know yourself and you will know the mind of all people. -- Rippie

Magical Visitation

“I have always enjoyed doing what you think is impossible.” wrote Rippie.

I responded “OK, come round my house tonight at 9pm my time.”

Rippie replied “I was there last night and you could not see me. Why come again.”

At this stage Rippie didn't even know I was English.

Rippie does not appreciate the difference between surreal and profound, between nonsense free verse and a koan. He seems to expect people to give him the benefit of the doubt and to draw the most favourable possible conclusions when he makes a statement that could be interpreted as either profound or comically inept. Don't doubt him: he is comically inept.

The Holy Resurrection

“No one ever dies. I have been what you call dead. It was only a door. Nothing in the universe is ever destroyed. It only changes form. There is no greater freedom than life with out the baggage of a body and the restrictions that brings. The body is just the womb of the spirit that we are. You will out grow it. Soul, spirit is energy maintained and directed beyond and with out the body.” - Rippie

Death is the irreversible ending of brain function, anybody who is alive by definition has not died. They might have been quite poorly but they have not died. Expecting a human brain to work better and see truth more clearly when it is almost dead is as logical as expecting a television set to work better when buried in a muddy trench.

The Big Lie

"There are many things which I have to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now. After my departure there will arise the ignorant and the crafty, and many things which I did speak will they withhold. Christ says, The written word will always be corrupted and a bible no exception. Jesus told the disciples not to leave any written word on earth when they die. They ask why not. Christ said, "The written word will always be corrupted, but the spirit of truth can not [sic] be corrupted." How then are we to spread the word," they ask? Jesus replied, "Do so from one heart to another teaching only two things, unconditional love and compassion. For when a person understands these two things, the spirit will teach all the rest." -- Rippie

Time and time again Rippie repeats this claim, that Jesus instructs his disciples not to leave any written word because the written word will always be corrupted. There is no evidence anywhere to be found that any followers of Jesus (even mythical ones) ever made such a claim - except for Michael Rippie.

The passage above contains some material taken from the Gospel of The Holy Twelve, an Essene non-canonical Gospel that has been regarded as lost and Rev. Gideon Jasper Richard Ouseley claims to have found, in an Aramaic text in a Buddhist monastery in Tibet. A story only slightly less fishy than the tales told by Joseph Smith. Come off it, a Catholic theologian who was a vegetarian and against strong drink translates lost manuscripts (that seem mysteriously to get lost again) that retell the synoptic gospels but make out Jesus didn't drink wine or eat meat. That does stink a little, doesn't it?

“After my departure there will arise the ignorant and the crafty, and many things will they ascribe unto Me that I never spake, and many things which I did speak will they withhold, but the day will come when the clouds shall be rolled away, and the Sun of Righteousness shall shine forth with healing in his wings.” - Gospel of the Holy Twelve

Poet?

==============================
 The Bell

 A bell is not a bell until you ring it.
 A song is not a song until you sing it.
 Love in your heart wasn't put there to stay.
 Love isn't love until you give it away.
 Author,
 Michael Edward Rippie, @
 ===============================

http://www.julie-andrews.net/tsom/Lyricsprint.htm
Sixteen Going On Seventeen - Reprise
*This part of the song was never used in the movie: *

Maria
A bell is no bell 'til you ring it
A song is no song 'til you sing it
And love in your heart wasn't put there to stay
Love isn't love... 'Til you give it away

Check it out. The fact that Rippie registered a copyright on "his poem" in 1985 says nothing good for Rippie or the efficiency of the US copyright system. They couldn't even be arsed to investigate.

http://members.fortunecity.com/ryanchunt/Broadway/soundmusic.html

(Maria)

A bell is no bell till you ring it
A song is no song till you sing it
And love in your heart wasn't put there to stay
Love isn't love till you give it away

When you're sixteen, going on seventeen
Waiting for life to start
Somebody kind who touches your mind
Will suddenly touch your heart
blah blah blah

Check out that "poem" of Rippie's in Google Groups to see how many times he's claimed it as his own, and see in how many different years he claims to have written it.

  2. Registration Number: PAu-699-609
    Title: Dalhart, Texas.
    Description: 1 p.
    Note: A poem.
    Claimant: Michael Edward Rippie
    Created: 1962
    Title on © Application: The Bell.
    Author on © Application: Michael E. Rippie.
    Special Codes: 1/B

This worthless copyright claim was registered in 1985.

The Sound of Music has been playing around the world since 1959. In the movie version they left out the first verse of the song  Sixteen Going On Seventeen - Reprise, but it is regularly used in the stage version.

Rippie paid for a registered copyright on "his poem" in 1985, claiming he wrote it in 1962 (at other times he claims other dates of "authorship"). Rippie was born in 1946 and Oscar Hammerstein wrote the original lyric in 1959, apparently stealing (and of course improving) this deleted verse from a Texas newspaper poetry competion that Rippie entered in 1961, a year after Hammerstein had died.

This story underlines exactly how trustworthy Michael Rippie is.

Vindictive

Since I have started to tell the world what Michael Rippie is really like he has prayed for me, and signed me up for spam, bought a domain name in my name to redirect to his website and seen to it that my email addresses are made public.

This screenshot shows his lack of imagination. After receiving some spam I hit the unsubscribe link (don't believe the scare stories, this often does work) and find out how my name got registered in the first place.

He uses my email address to subscribe to emails that I am not interested in. See his lack of imagination? The zip code 89012 corresponds to Henderson, Nevada. Who do I know in Nevada? More to the point who in Nevada wants me to receive spam? Rippie's own zipcode is 89013.

Copyright Notice. The use of material written and otherwise produced by Michael Rippie and presented here is taken to be covered by the Fair Use provisions of US Copyright law.

The material is of no intrinsic value, much of it was placed directly in the public domain by being published on newsgroups, no loss is being suffered by the copyright holders and this piece is in the form of criticism.

© 1999 - 2009 by Martin Willett.

mwillett.org: Debate Unlimited